Wednesday, August 22, 2007

List of problems that are frustrating to me

1. My manager does not want to approve my leave because she wants me to finish the job before I go on leave.

+ Direct: I will finish 3 days ahead of the schedule => this is also a commitment I make to myself.

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

Plan for the Proactivity: the 30-Day Test project (22 Aug 2007 to 22 Sep 2007)

(With this effort, I will start to practice myself as a Manager of my life, as a manager of the Self Company)

1. INTRODUCTION

1.1 Scope

For 30 days, I will focus ONLY on my Circle of Influence and practice being proactive

Targets:
1. My marriage
2. My family
3. My job

2. PROJECT ORGANIZATION

2.1 Project Organization Structure

AMY – Circle of Influence – Circle of Concern

2.2 Roles and Responsibilities
















Role Responsibility
PM (Amy) Plan and update the progress
Implementor (Amy) When I make mistake, I will
1. admit it
2. correct it
3. learn from it

=> I will list down the mistakes I made and do my best to complete the tasks for admit, correct and learn from the items of the list.

I won’t get into a blaming, accusing mode. If I start blaming, I will need to list down and punish myself. I won’t argue for other’s weaknesses. I need to look at others’ weaknesses with compassion, not accusation.

I won’t argue for my own. I should work on things I have control over – myself. Work on BE

With any problem, the first question in mind should be “What should I choose my response to be?”

It’s how we make and keep Commitments
It’s how we Response to difficulty
It’s how we View our problems
It’s where we put our Energies
It’s the Language we use

=> CRVEL
QA (Amy)
I will need to do self-check against the things I list down here at the end of everyday of the 30-day period. I will need to review the situation in the context of my Circle of Influence and ask myself how I could response proactively

Thursday, August 16, 2007

7 habits of highly effective people and the 1st habit

HABIT 1: PROACTIVE

SUMMARY

Proactivity means more than merely taking initiative. I myself have to have the initiative and the responsibility to make things happen.

Proactivity = initiative + responsibility
Responsibilty = response ability = the ability to CHOOSE my response.

My behavior should be the product of my own conscious choice, BASED ON VALUE, not a product of my conditions, based on feeling.

+ Yes, this is currently my biggest weakness. I always react based on my feelings and my intuition.
+ I must train myself to be proactive, to be VALUE DRIVEN, to have the ability to transform an impulse in to a value

Now, for the current situation, I am feeling down and depreciated, being put in the Mere Hard Skill Team, being arranged to sit in a non-cubical seat, being the lowest level in the team… What should I do to be proactive and value-driven in this case? Yes, dear Mr. Covey, it is extremely hard to accept emotionally, as what you said. Is it because I had 24 years of blaming my own misery to the circumstances? Ok, let’s say it out loud: “I am what I am today because of the choices I made yesterday”. Yes, it is true. I chose not to speak up for myself for being more involved in the more active team, the Soft Skill team. I chose not to speak up to the lead to let me involve more in the soft skills part. What was my reason? The reason was because I would like to practice more on my technical skills. That was my call. I should never say “I choose otherwise”.

The book says “It’s not what happens to us, but our response to what happens to us that hurts us.” So it is my responsibility to let this happens to me. I have to blame myself? Is it what Mr. Covey means?

Yes, my character and my basic identity are not hurt at all. Yet, my emotion is still hurt.

It is said that the most difficult experiences will help to develop my internal powers, my freedom to handle tough circumstances in the future and to inspire others to do so as well… I've never experienced nor witness such things before... However, I did read and watch movies based on a lot of such inspiring stories... But the effect is not really that much...

7 habits of highly effective people and P/PC Balance theory

Currently, my fiancé is working like hell to meet the deadline of a BIG project with a big CUSTOMER. During this time, I am reading 7 habits of highly effective people. I am reading the part about the balance between P Production (the golden egg) and PC Production Capability (the goose). It was related to a fable about a farmer who had a goose that can produce a golden egg each day. The egg is pure gold and he became fabulously wealthy. However, as his increasing wealth became greed and impatience; he decided to kill the goose to get all the golden eggs at once. But there were no golden eggs when he opened the goose. Then, there was no way for him to get any more golden eggs.



I recognized that the boss of my fiancĂ©’s company is having excessive focus on P, on the goose, by asking employees to work harder and longer hours (although they are normally working longer hours than other jobs). It will result in ruined health, worn-out machines, and broken relationships. And then, little by little, the employee will begin to resign… As the matter of fact, a number of employees left, leaving him, the boss in the current kind of shit… Actually, he is not like killing the goose or something like that, but he was like feeding the goose once a day (he did treated the staff dinner or supper) and asking it the produce 100 golden eggs per day. I know that he is in the bad position, in short of man power. But he’s the one who leads him in this situation, he’s the one who refused to make enough salary increment to the staff when he’s got the chance, he’s the one who did not manage the project properly… Anyway, I am not trying to blame him or something. I just want to remind myself, if I became a boss, I will need to treat the staff well, as first priority, planed the project properly to avoid any last minute rush. I will need to focus on the long term benefit, not the details to make it perfect in one second but let the whole project being delayed for months…

Monday, August 6, 2007

Watch and learn, be confident, be creative, myself

The lesson from today's crisis is to list down all the cases that can happen and cater solution for each case... This way will cover all the issue that can happen later on...

However, one more problem is that I should watch and learn from others, from seniors who have way much more experience than me, a pretty fresh graduate... Moreover, I myself should be more and more and more and more CREATIVE in the solution... Pls pls pls myself, think out of the box, OUT OF THE BOX... Watch and learn, be confident, be creative, myself...

Wednesday, August 1, 2007

How to deal with family's problem

Today we discussed about how to deal with any problems that we may encountered after our marriage (even applicable before marriage actually). The key point for any problem in a relationship, more generally in life, is to judge my own self before judging others...

Case study 1: if a man cheats on a woman, almost every woman will react as if it was solely his fault. She thinks she has the right to demand every single thing later, sacrificing a lot things tolerantly... never judges herself what she did to make him far away from her...